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    PILOT (Episode 1)

    Suburban housewife Mary Alice has a typical day of chores--and then shoots herself. Her neighbor, Mrs. Huber, uses a borrowed blender as a pretense to and check out what had happened, but after finding Mary Alice's dead body, Mrs. Huber decides to keep the blender for herself.

    Soon we meet Mary Alice's four friends:

    Gabrielle is married to the rich Carlos. She's sleeping with 17 year old gardener, John, on the side. The gardening isn't getting done, so Gabrielle covers for John by leaving a party to go mow the lawn herself.

    Lynette a former career woman, left the boardroom to raise her four kids: three bratty boys and a baby girl. After meeting an old friend at the supermarket, Lynette lies about how much she loves staying at home. At Mary Alice's wake, Lynette wades into the pool to pull her boys out. And when her husband Tom wants to have sex despite not having a condom, Lynette punches him.

    Bree's Martha Stewart on steroids. She can cook, she can clean, she can do her own upholstery. But her husband Rex isn't happy with this, and tells Bree he wants a divorce. She's so distraught she adds onions to his dinner, momentarily forgetting Rex is deeply allergic to them. Rex is taken to the hospital, but even then Bree can't let her Stepford exterior go, and she cries in the bathroom.

    Susan's a divorcee looking for love in all the wrong places. She may have found a new love interest in Mike, her hunky new neighbor. He doesn't seem to mind that she can't cook at all. But she has some competition from Edie, who's known for always getting her man. Incorrectly fearing that Edie's sleeping with Mike, Susan goes over to Edie's home, and manages to accidentally burn Edie's house down.

    Of course, perhaps it would be best for Susan to avoid Mike. After all, he has a gun, and he makes a mysterious call to someone about his real reasons for being there. And he's not the only man with a secret here: Mary Alice's widower Paul is caught by Paul's son, Zach, as Paul digs something up from the pool.

    As the episode comes to an end, the four leads gather together to deal with Mary Alice's things, but find a note addressed to Mary Alice. Someone knew a secret about Mary Alice, and the letter came on the day she died. What was Mary Alice's secret, and who's responsible for Mary Alice killing herself?

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    AH, BUT UNDERNEATH (Episode 2)

    Bree, Lynette, Susan, and Gabrielle decide to not tell Mary Alice's husband Paul about the letter. Paul has a secret of his own, though: he takes a toy box filled with something and dumps it into the water, but the toybox floats back up.

    Gabrielle's torn between her two men: her husband Carlos expects sex from her because of the gifts he brings, while fling John presents her with a perfect rose. Gabrielle finds she prefers the rose even after Carlos brings her home a new car--although Gabrielle's not about to dump Carlos.

    Mrs. Huber discovers the measuring cup Susan left behind at Edie's home, and also learns Susan's missing her cup. But Susan has other problems this week when Mike's dog prefers Edie over her. At dinner with Mike and Edie, Susan dabs gravy on herself in hopes of getting Mike's dog to like her, but this backfires when the dog chokes on her earring. The dog's going to be fine, but Susan realizes Mike's not ready to move on because he's still in love with his wife.

    Lynette's bratty kids get her pulled over by a cop. Mrs. Huber has some advice for Lynette: she should leave her kids on the side of the road, and not come back for a few moments, as this will calm the kids down. When she tries this, though, her kids disappear. She finds a mean woman has them, and isn't pleased with her mothering tactics. In the end, her bratty kids come to her rescue.

    Bree's displeased when Rex insists they attend a marriage counselor. At Dr. Goldfine's, Bree avoids discussing her feelings until she opens up in a private session. Rex is stunned when their shrink suggests he's the one with a problem, not Bree.

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    PRETTY LITTLE PICTURE (Episode 3)

    Paul and his son Zach compete for who can be the creepiest: Zach confronts his father after finding the gun Mary Alice used to kill herself, but he falls apart when Bree visits. We learn that human remains were found in the water where Paul dumped the box. But it's Bree who may be coming closest to the truth, as she steals Mary Alice's tape from her shrink's when she's looking for her husband's tape. But Paul's secrets may never be exposed, as he takes steps to sell his house and leave Wisteria Lane behind.

    Gabrielle's caught in a liplock with John by a little girl, Ashley, who turns out to be her new next door neighbor. Ashley demands a bike in exchange for her secrecy, and then insists that Gabrielle teach her to ride it. This isn't easy for Gabrielle to do in high heels, but she's desperate to keep her husband from learning about the affair.

    Susan's still bitter about the end of her marriage to Karl, who doesn't see why she wants him to apologize to her about their divorce. After an argument with Karl, Susan ends up naked outside, but this turns out to be okay as it leads to Mike agreeing to dinner with Susan. Susan gets an apology from Brandy, Karl's girlfriend, and this satisfies Susan for now.

    When Tom doesn't want to go to the party Bree's throwing, Lynette decides to go alone--and she gives her kids cookies to keep them busy. After the party, Lynette wants to know if she and Tom are happy, and they answer that question by sharing a dance as her kids look on at their parents.

    Bree decides to host a party Mary Alice had planned before her suicide, but insists to Rex that no one should know they're in counseling. At the party, Rex spills the secret anyway, causing Bree to spill a secret of her own: Rex cries when he ejaculates. Afterwards, Rex moves out of the house and into a hotel.

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    WHO'S THAT WOMAN? (Episode Four)

    The women listen to the tape of Mary Alice's session with Dr. Goldfine, but learn little other than that her real name was Angela. They finally decide to tell Paul about the letter, but he claims that Mary Alice was troubled and wrote the letter to herself. None of them believe Paul's telling the truth. Paul hires someone to find out who wrote the letter to Mary Alice.

    Gabrielle's affair with John is almost discovered by the cable guy, but soon Carlos believes his wife is sleeping with the cable guy. He even questions John about whether Gabrielle's sleeping with someone else. Carlos attacks the cable guy at his home, only to find Gabrielle's supposed love interest is gay.

    Susan and Edie are both frustrated that the other is pursuing Mike. Mrs. Huber learns of Susan's interest in Mike and uses the measuring cup she found to blackmail Susan into doing things for her. Susan and her daughter Julie take control of the situation by having Julie steal the cup from Mrs. Huber's home, but to keep Edie from going into the house, Susan's forced to arrange a date between Edie and Mike. Susan tells Mrs. Huber exactly what she thinks of her.

    Lynette's told that her twin boys must be separated if they're to remain in public school--either that, or she should treat them for ADD. She gets the pills, but can't bring herself to give them to her kids--so she finds solace in alcohol instead.

    Bree's kids, Danielle and Andrew, realize their father's moved out when Bree cooks a huge dinner. Andrew acts out by leaving home and going to a strip club, but Bree tracks him down and humiliates him. Bree and Andrew make up for now, but there's a price for Andrew: he's lost the door to his bedroom.

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    COME IN, STRANGER (Episode Five)

    Gabrielle's mother-in-law Juanita comes to Wisteria Lane at Carlos' behest, in the hopes of learning who Gabrielle's sleeping with. Gabrielle avoids being caught with John by framing Juanita for shoplifting. Juanita not-so-subtly threatens Gabrielle by suggesting she killed Carlos's father and is willing to do away with Gabrielle too.

    There's a break-in on Wisteria Lane, and while nothing's taken, everyone's on edge. Susan finds the screwdriver left behind, and after giving it to the police officer, Rick, she then makes a date with him. Rick claims to have taken the screwdriver to be checked for fingerprints but when Susan learns he lied about this, she breaks things off with him. Mike's happy about this development, as the screwdriver's his! Mike and Susan share their first kiss after he saves her from the bad neighborhood where Rick left her after their date.

    Lynette needs to get her kids into private school, and she convinces Bree to lie for her to a prestigious school concerning her twin boys. But at the interview concerning the school, Lynette and Tom learn their twins need to be observed first. Lynette makes her kids do a lot of exercise before the session so that they're practically asleep when they're observed. When they need $15,000 as payment for the school, Lynette gets Tom to sell his boat.

    Bree finds Zach trying to clean up where his mother shot herself. She invites him to dinner and after telling Zach a Christmas story Zach suggests he knows more about his mother's death than others realize. Later, she invites him to dinner again, but then chooses to go to her husband Rex when he wants to talk. When she returns home, she learns Zach's broken in and decorated for Christmas. Zach refuses to explain himself, but in the comfort of his own home, he apparently hits his father. Paul takes Zach away to an undisclosed location.

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    RUNNING TO STAND STILL (Episode Six)

    Gabrielle's still being investigated by Juanita. Gabrielle gets away from Juanita after learning of Juanita's gambling addiction and using this to her advantage. She even briefly gets Juanita on her side by telling her she'll cover for the money she owes. But Juanita realizes the truth: Carlos tells her he told Gabrielle about her gambling problem, and Juanita suspects Gabrielle is sleeping with John because she avoids him in public.

    Rex and Dr. Goldfine want Bree to discuss sex in their sessions, but Bree leaves at the suggestion that she's done something wrong sexually. In a private session at a restaurant, Bree makes it clear to Dr. Goldfine that she's no prude: she loves everything about sex except for the scrotum. But her attempt to seduce her husband in his hotel room falls to pieces when she tries to clean up before they can have sex. Afterwards, Bree suggests that Rex is the one who's hiding something about his sexual urges, but Rex refuses to tell her anything about his desires.

    Lynette faces off with fellow mom Maisy at a meeting about a play that Lynette's twins are in. Maisy wants to make the wolf in Little Red Riding Hood into less of a villain, and while everyone thinks this is ridiculous, only Lynette brings the problem up--until she convinces everyone else to take her side. Maisy tries some passive-aggressive moves against Lynette: she threatens to drop Lynette's boys from the play, then not-so-accidentally leaves Lynette off of the play programs. Lynette confronts Maisy in public, causing Maisy to leave the play, to everyone else's delight. Tired from making the costumes for the play, Lynette pops some of her sons' ADD medication and finds it gives her the buzz she needs to keep going.

    Susan correctly believes that Paul's lying about Zach's whereabouts. Zach's actually in an institution for troubled kids, and there Paul encourages Zach's doctor to keep him drugged. Susan learns of Zach's whereabouts after following Paul in a neighbor's car, but what can she do now? She goes to the institution under guise of working on a children's book, then has daughter Julie sneak into Zach's room to question him about his mother's suicide. Zach only tells her something about someone named Dana before Julie's caught and must flee. Neither Susan or Julie knows of any Dana connected to Zach or Mary Alice, but the answer's closer than they suspect, as Susan bought a baby blanket from Paul's yard sale that has the name "Dana" on it.

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    ANYTHING YOU CAN DO (Episode Seven)

    When a man collapses on her lawn, Mrs. Huber--jealous over Bree's perfect lawn--moves the body over to Bree's lawn so as to ruin Bree's flowers.

    At a book club where almost no one has read the book, Bree disposes of the other women so she can talk with Susan, Gabrielle, and Lynette about Zach. Susan tells them what happened in the previous episode.3 Susan finds the embroidery with Dana's name on it and she and Lynette conclude Dana was a baby. Later, Paul meets with his real estate agent, Edie; after she leaves, Paul finds something Edie left behind, compares it to the letter, and concludes Edie wrote the letter to his wife. Paul hires Mr. Shaw to do away with Edie, and later an unsuspecting Edie meets Mr. Shaw at a bar.

    Susan goes to meet Mike for his date--only to find him cancelling the date because of his sexy houseguest, Kendra, who he insists is only a friend. Kendra's father is bankrolling Mike for the investigation, and Kendra's apparently someone's sister: Mary Alice? Dana? When Edie learns Mike is taking Kendra to a cowboy bar, Edie convinces Susan to follow them to the bar. When Mike catches Susan, Susan humiliates herself while trying to show she was there for a bullride. Afterwards, Kendra makes it clear she and Mike are only friends, but she suggests to Susan that Susan ask Mike why he moved to Wisteria Lane.


    Tom convinces Lynette to throw together a dinner for his partners the day after tomorrow. When Lynette finds she's out of ADD medication, she tries in vain to get one from the woman who gave her the idea; then she steals pills from the bathroom of her kids' playmate Timmy. At the dinner party, Lynette comes up with an idea for Tom's job that is better than his. Afterwards, Tom and Lynette argue, but Tom softens and tells his wife she's a great wife and mother.

    Gabrielle's mad when she learns John has a date with Danielle. Gabrielle tries to get rid of Danielle by sponsoring Danielle for modeling academy, but John dumps her when he learns Gabrielle's plot. Gabrielle convinces John to meet her for sex one last time, but Juanita, on to the plan, follows John and Gabrielle to a motel where she proceeds to take pictures of them together. When John can't get the camera back, they fear all is lost--but Gabrielle's saved when Juanita's run down by a car.

    Bree and Rex squabble at the principal's office after learning Andrew broke a boy's nose. She blames Andrew, he blames their marriage--which is ending, as she learns her hubby's serving her with divorce papers soon. Bree becomes hurt when Andrew wants to live with his father now that his parents' marriage is ending.Rex attempts to buy his kids' love by giving Andrew a new car and Danielle an opportunity to go to modeling academy. Bree retaliates by throwing her kids out of the house, and Danielle gets back into her mother's good graces by giving up modeling academy. After Andrew can't convince his dad to let him live with him, Andrew goes out of control with his car and runs down Juanita with his car. When Bree learns what has happened, she calls Rex, who returns home--so they can keep the truth from coming out.

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    GUILTY (Episode Eight)

    Bree's family argues about the accident but Bree ends the discussion by telling them they'll get rid of the car--and then have pancakes for breakfast. When Lynette, Susan, and Bree clean up outside Gabrielle's home, Lynette unnerves Bree by suggesting the person responsible should be put away for life. The Van De Kamps visit Carlos and Gabrielle and afterwards Andrew seems relieved to be off the hook. Bree confronts Andrew about his feelings but he's not concerned about Juanita and is more upset he's lost his car. Bree's concerned her son's so lackadasical about putting Juanita in a coma.

    At the hospital, John visits a comatose Juanita and then goes to the chapel to pray. Gabrielle doesn't want to give Juanita a sponge bath. Later, Carlos and Gabrielle squabble when he wants kids and she doesn't. Gabrielle has other problems, too, when John confesses that he confessed everything to a priest. Gabrielle gets assurance from the priest that he'll stay quiet, but when he wants her to make a confession, she tells him she can't do that as she prefers to be happy, even though she knows that's selfish. Gabrielle gives Juanita her sponge bath.

    Lynette attempts acupuncture to relax but her boys won't settle down. She tells the acupuncturist about her ADD pills and she's given a strong herbal remedy for sleep. Lynette doesn't get to use the pills because her kids arrive for a Cub Scout meeting, so she ends up taking several pills at once. Everything goes so badly for Lynette that she fantasizes that Mary Alice gives her a gun to kill herself. Lynette gives her kids to Susan then leaves without explaining herself. Susan and Bree find Lynette, who admits she popped the pills, and Susan and Bree help Lynette by admitting they've had problems as a mother too. Later, while finally getting some rest, Lynette dreams of her kids being happy and of Mary Alice smiling at her.


    Susan makes a date with Mike but when he's on the phone, she finds his money stash. She agrees to let Mike's tile guy in while he's away. However, everything goes awry when she ends up falling into the floor of Mike's bathroom, and Mike tosses her out when he realizes she found his stash of money. Susan tries to apologize to Mike but they argue and Mike dumps Susan. Later, Mike apologizes to Susan, and the two become passionate together.

    Edie and Mrs. Huber squabble because Mrs. Huber took money from Edie. Edie moves out of Mrs. Huber's home. Paul tells Mr. Shaw to go ahead with the hit on Edie. But when Mr. Shaw goes to kill Edie, he learns from her that the stationery belonged to Mrs. Huber, not Edie. When Mr. Shaw tells Paul the truth, he calls off the hit and goes to speak with Mrs. Huber himself. Mrs. Huber admits she sent the note in hopes of getting money from Mary Alice, but she's not sorry, as Mary Alice did something to a baby. An enraged Paul hits Mrs. Huber with a blender, then strangles her to death.

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    SUSPICIOUS MINDS (Episode Nine)

    While visiting Juanita at the hospital, Gabrielle searches for something to add meaning to her life--and decides to put on a charity fashion show for the hospital. Gabrielle and John's mother, Helen, discuss John's crumbling relationship with Danielle. Later, while John's working for the fashion show, Gabrielle puts her foot into John's crotch beneath the table--and Susan happens to see this. When Susan confronts her, Gabrielle admits her misdeeds but bristles when Susan compares the affair to Susan's cheating ex. As John and his friend discuss John's affair with a married woman, Helen overhears some of this. Susan tries to talk John out of the relationship with Gabrielle, but when she places her hand on his cheek, a spying Helen believes Susan's John's mystery mistress.

    At the fashion show, Edie's wearing a skimpy dress but is overshadowed by Susan's fabulous dress. But when Helen confronts Susan about her supposed affair with John and tears her dress, Susan's forced out onto the runway looking horrible, to Edie's delight. Susan demands that Gabrielle tell Helen the truth, and Gabrielle does just that--but Helen claims it's not over. Gabrielle can't bring herself to tell Carlos the truth, but there are other problems for her, as the FBI shows up to arrest Carlos for something he claims someone else did. Susan comforts her friend Gabrielle.

    Paul buries Mrs. Huber, who's assumed to be away visiting her sister. Later, after receiving a letter from Zach, Julie admits to Susan that she and Zach have been sending letters to each other. Paul's problems escalate when he learns Zach's vanished from the mental home, and he doesn't realize that Zach's in the neighborhood--specifically, he's with Julie! Zach doesn't want to tell Julie about his problems, but he reacts when Julie shows him the baby blanket with "Dana" on it. Zach tells Julie he believes he killed his baby sister Dana and his parents covered it up. Julie and Zach's hug turns into a kiss! Paul's looking for a missing Zach, but Susan insists Julie doesn't know anything.

    Meanwhile, the detectives have investigated the chest Paul dumped into the water and tracked down its maker, who learns that the box contained an adult woman--a chopped up woman.

    Tom plans to take the kids away for an afternoon so Lynette can relax, but Lynette insists it's not enough; she wants to hire a nanny. Lynette gets Bree's help to find a great nanny, as Lynette plans to poach someone else's nanny. At a park where nannies often come with their kids, Lynette sees many lousy nannies but also meets Claire, a great nanny. Lynette tries to "pick up" Claire, who sends Lynette away with her address as Claire's employer Alexis approaches. Lynette manages to convince Claire to take a job with her.

    Bree's upset that Andrew's so cheerful, but Rex disagrees with her when she wants to remove Andrew from the swim team. Amidst their argument, Rex and Bree miss Andrew winning the swim race. Bree becomes upset when she realizes Andrew's stoned; though he denies it, she insists he urinate into a container for her. Bree brings the urine to Rex while he golfs, but when he claims the pot's no big deal and argues that she always makes the decisions in their life, an angered Bree tosses the urine at him. Bree sneaks into Andrew's gym locker, finds the pot, and then makes an anonymous call to the school. Andrew's caught with the pot, and Rex finally gets mad at Andrew for his actions, but Andrew shuts his mother out of his room.

    COME BACK TO ME (Episode 10)

    Lynette can't convince her boys to eat her brussel sprouts; Claire convinces Lynette to leave the kids to her. When Lynette tells Bree about her doubts about leaving the kids with Claire, Bree convinces Lynette to install a nannycam. Lynette finds that Claire's great with the kids--and starts to become jealous of Claire's relationship with her sons, especially after they make it clear they prefer Claire reading to them over Lynette reading. Lynette tells Claire to make sure her sons eat all their brussel sprouts, then later that night Lynette takes pleasure in watching the tape of her sons refusing to eat their vegetables for Claire.

    Carlos is denied bail until someone can find his passport. Gabrielle searches for the passport and becomes frustrated when her car is repoed. When Gabrielle learns that she might lose all of her possessions, she moves everything to Bree's place, but finds what she really misses is her husband. Carlos tells her where she can find his passport, and also asks her to burn some papers. But when Gabrielle finds the passport and papers, she burns the passport.

    Bree's husband Rex has been having sex with housewife-turned-hooker Maisy Gibbons; he's been going to her because she satisfies him sexually using handcuffs, stilettos, etc. Bree learns Rex has been with someone and becomes mad when he encourages her to have sex with someone too. While with Maisy, Rex has a heart attack, and when Bree arrives at the hospital she learns of his connection to Maisy. Bree confronts Maisy, who tells Bree she's been giving Rex something Bree didn't. Bree goes to the hospital and tells Rex she's going to divorce him and will enjoy destroying Rex. Bree goes to a lawyer's office.

    Julie lies to Susan then takes food upstairs to Zach, who almost leaves when Julie suggests telling Susan the truth. Susan's frustrated that she and Mike can't find a good date for their first lovemaking; the next day, she calls Mike up, asks him over in hopes of seducing him, then prepares for their first time together. She hears a noise, not realizing it's Zach, but when she goes to attack the intruder--she hits Mike with a Thigh Master instead before Zach is discovered. Caught in her lies, Julie attempts to convince Susan to keep Zach there, but Mike takes Zach home. Julie calls out her mother on how Julie's acted like the mother for Susan for some time, and Susan can't get through to Julie.

    Paul acts relieved when Mike brings Zach home, but later Paul's creepy again while eating dinner with Zach. Paul encourages Zach to repress his memories that are coming back--and then urges Zach to eat more potatoes.

    Edie wants to get into Mrs. Huber's home to retrieve some things left behind. When she can't find anyone who knows where Mrs. Huber is, Edie gets the police, who break into the home--as Paul watches.



    MOVE ON (Episode 11)

    Andrew's mad when he learns Rex won't be coming home, and Bree ends up letting Res stay in the home after all. When Rex comes home, Bree tells her husband she has no more feelings for him. After learning that she may need to care for Rex for months, Bree asks her pharmacist George out on a date. After their successful date, George and Bree almost kiss when Andrew discovers them. Bree attempts to explain herself and ends up telling Andrew about Rex's affair. Andrew doesn't believe this and storms off. The next day, Andrew tells his mother Rex told him the truth, and he thinks she should send Rex packing. Bree defends Rex and even says he's the one love of her life. However, she still calls up George to ask him out again.

    Susan's with Mike when her ex-husband Karl drops by. He tells her that his relationship with Brandy is over and Susan ends up both hugging Karl twice and inviting him to Julie's birthday party. Later, Mike tells Susan he loves her, but she can't bring herself to say that back to him, and he thinks she may still have feelings for Karl. She denies this. At Julie's birthday party, Susan's horrified to find Karl brought Edie at his date, and things become worse as Edie kisses Karl. Susan doesn't want to sing karaoke but agrees to do so, but before going on Edie lets it slip that Karl felt her up when he was married to Susan. Susan tries to sing but ends up yelling at Karl instead. The next day, Karl tries to woo Susan back, but she denies having any feelings for him, and instead goes to Mike and tells him she loves him.

    Lynette's husband Tom goes downstairs one evening to find their nanny Claire in the buff--and he responds by going back upstairs and having sex with Lynette. When Lynette learns the truth behind the encounter from Claire, she's upset with Tom, who denies any feelings for Claire. But when Lynette catches Tom staring at Claire's breasts, he realizes there is a problem. Lynette ends up calling a nanny service in search of unattractive help.

    Gabrielle's frustrated she's lost access to Carlos's money, and she may need to get a job. She goes to a modeling agency but finds that the jobs there are nothing like she was used to before she married Carlos. Gabrielle acts as the spokesmodel for a Buick show and when Tom and Lynette discover her there she lies about why she's dressed so nicely at the mall.
    When Gabrielle loses electricity, she calls Carlos' lawyer and says she knows where his passport is located.

    Edie's surprised to find Mrs. Huber's sister Felicia believes Mrs. Huber is dead--but doesn't care as she hates her. Everyone comes together to pass out fliers about Mrs. Huber. The police find Mrs. Huber's abandoned car and begin searching for her in that area. Fearing the police may be getting too close, Paul digs something up from Mrs. Huber's body and plants it in Mike's garage. A man finds his dog searching through a pile--and Mrs. Huber's body is sticking out.




    EVERY DAY A LITTLE DEATH (Episode 12)

    The women turn down Edie when Edie wants them to help her dispose of Mrs. Huber's ashes. But when Susan learns that Mrs. Huber kept detailed journals, Susan realizes she must suck up to Edie then tell her she burnt down Edie's home. Susan agrees to help Edie dispose of the ashes but before they can dump them into the lake, Susan admits her misdeed--and then Edie tosses the ashes on Susan. Edie agrees to keep quiet if Susan will invite her to the weekly poker party, and Susan goes along with this.


    Gabrielle's pleased that Carlos is home, even if he's on house arrest. But she's less pleased with Carlos' wish to have a child. She eats their dinner outside where Carlos can't go to spite him. When Gabrielle can't commit to being with him come rain or shine, Carlos screws with her birth control pills in hopes of getting her pregnant.


    Lynette can't get into yoga because she's too late to get her kids into daycare. The next time she tries to get into yoga, one of her kids is believed to be dying as his head's been shaved because of gum in his hair; this gets Lynette into the class. Lynette enjoys her lie but eventually she's caught and admits the truth--then leaves yoga behind.


    Bree's enjoying her dates with George, but she's partly doing it because of Rex watching. But she's pleased when George gives her a gun. But when she goes to show him how to shoot, he tries to kiss her, and ends up shooting himself--and losing a toe. Bree breaks things off with George but he doesn't want to let go--and ends up watching a tape of her in the pharmacy.


    The police finds Mrs. Huber's body, and the news quickly spreads around Wisteria Lane. Meanwhile, Mike finds his gun and money gone--and a message informing him that his backer's hiring someone else. Mike confronts this man, who says he's dying of a brain tumor and wants answers about his daughter Deirdre's disappearance before he dies. He reminds Mike that Mike left Deirdre to marry Mike's wife, but also notes that Mike once killed for her. Mike's back on the trail of the disappeared Deirdre and agrees he'll take care fo the supposed killer.


    YOUR FAULT (Episode Thirteen)

    Susan's upset when she finds Julie and Zach kissing--and even more upset when she learns Zach's going with Julie to a dance. But Paul isn't upset that his son's kissing Julie, for, as he tells Susan, they're moving soon. This doesn't please Zach one bit. Susan eavesdrops on a phonecall between Julie and Zach where Julie says she's keeping Zach's secret about Dana from her mom. Zach tells his dad he told Julie about his memories of killing Dana. At the dance, Susan bluffs with Paul and gets him to tell her that Zach killed Dana years before. Afterwards, however, Paul tells Zach he didn't kill Dana--because Dana's still alive. When Susan tries to get Zach to leave Julie alone, Zach becomes angry and Susan forbids Zach and Julie from ever being together. However, Julie and Zach meet secretly, neither ready to give up on each other.


    Rex and Bree's meeting with their divorce lawyer takes a turn when Rex tells Bree he wants to call off the divorce. Bree, on the other hand, only wants Rex's country club membership. Later, when Bree again rebuffs Rex's wish for reconciliation, Bree suggests she may sleep with George soon. George meets up with Bree one late night at the diner, and while he acts very creepy he suggests she reconcile with Rex. But when alone with Rex at the pharmacy, George sings a different tune, and he disposes of Rex's pills so he can give Rex something else instead. Later at home with Bree, Rex takes a pill--but what has George done to it?


    John's parents convince Gabrielle to talk John out of dropping his college plans. But Gabrielle fails to get through to John, who wants Gabrielle to marry him. Gabrielle tells John's parents she's giving back the wedding ring, but when Gabrielle tells John they can't be together, he gets mad. Gabrielle tells John he was just a play thing, but at the same time she appears affected by his feelings for her.


    Tom's dad Rodney arrives for a visit. Things become complicated when Lynette catches Rodney with a woman other than his wife. When Rodney refuses to be ashamed for his actions, Lynette tosses him out of the house. And then, when Tom admits to Lynette that he knew about his father's affairs and isn't that bothered by it, Lynette tosses him out. Later, Lynette tries to make things up with Tom but also insists she'll leave Tom if he ever cheats on her. A worried Tom tells his dad that he's not sure how Lynette would react if he learned what Tom's kept from her.


    LOVE IS IN THE AIR (Episode 14)

    Bree tells Dr. Goldfine that things have returned to normal and she and Rex are planning a dinner party. But when he pressures her to stop repressing, she questions what Rex may be hiding about his sexual interests. After pushing Rex for an answer, Bree's surprised when Rex admits he wants her to dominate him sexually. She doesn't understand at first and is disgusted when he shares a video with her. But she pulls herself together and accepts Rex's offer. She agrees to the kinky sex, but she insists on washing the handcuffs in the dishwasher first.

    Lynette's kids give her a nice pot as a gift, but she soon learns it was stolen from her neighbor, Mrs. McClosky. Lynette hates this neighbor but gets her kids to write a note of apology. But when the neighbor accuses the brats of stealing other things from her, Lynette becomes angry, leading to her tossing an egg in her neighbor's face. It's Lynette who has egg all over her face, though, when she learns her kids have been stealing after all. Lynette gets her boys to apologize to the neighbor, who's nice to her kids in private but is again gruff when she returns them to their mother.

    Susan and Mike have planned a special dinner for Valentine's Day--but the day before, Susan's ideas about her man are challenged when she learns he wants kids. She's less sure about having kids, but Julie tells Susan she has to tell Mike the truth. Mike has other issues: he breaks into a home, rifles through the man's things--and then gets shot by the old man before he escapes. Someone connected to Noah, the old man funding Mike, sews up Mike's injury. At the dinner with Susan, Mike hides his growing injury as Susan tells him she doesn't want more kids. He tries to leave, but collapses because of the injury. At the hospital, Susan overhears a doctor and nurse who don't believe Mike shot himself accidentally. Mike tells Susan he wants her more than he wants kids. Everything becomes even worse for Susan and Mike's relationship as Lynette gives Susan something her boys took from Mike's garage: it's Mrs. Huber's, and it has blood on it.

    Gabrielle fires her housekeeper Yao Lin after the two squabble again. Later, Gabrielle takes a job working at a bed store but finds she's supposed to model a bed. She doesn't like this job and even puts up a sign telling people to stop questioning her. When she admits to her boss that the job's beneath her, he fires her. Gabrielle takes a job at a cosmetics counter and even ends up making over Yao Lin, although she insists she's going to pick herself up again, just as she always does.

    Mrs. Huber's sister Felicia brings Paul his present to Mary Alice he always had delivered each year. She sees a picture of Mary Alice and believes it's Angela Forrest from Utah, but Paul claims this is wrong. Later, however, Felicia finds a picture of Angela/Mary Alice in front of a rehab center. Who is Angela, and why did she change her name to Mary Alice?


    IMPOSSIBLE (Episode 15)

    Gabrielle's upset when John's friend Justin insinuates that he'll tell Carlos the truth about her affair with John unless Gabrielle sleeps with Justin. When Gabrielle comes close to telling John about Justin's blackmail attempt, Justin admits he only wants to sleep with Gabrielle because he thinks he might be gay. Gabrielle kisses Justin, who realizes he is gay after all. Gabrielle's also upset about her and Carlos' lack of money, but she and Carlos plan to sell their house and move into an apartment.


    Bree finds a condom in a laundry basket. After first believing it's Rex's, and then suspecting it's Andrew's, she learns the condom belongs to Danielle, who plans on having sex with John. Bree goes to John, who says he's not into Danielle. Bree has John tell Danielle off so she'll stay away from him and not hope for sex.


    With advice from her friends, Susan tells the police what she knows about Mike. She stands by him, even as he's arrested. Susan's pleased to find that Mike was with her when Mrs. Huber was murdered, and she acts as his alibi. But when the detectives don't believe her, Susan learns Mike was convicted for drugs and manslaughter. A furious Susan tells Mike to stay away from her. Meanwhile, Mike's told Noah about these latest complications, and after Noah agrees to take care of the problem, Noah meets with the detective and asks what he can do to make the detective happy.


    Lynette's disappointed when Tom tells her he was passed over for a promotion. She encourages him to stand up for himself. When the person who was going to get the promotion collapses, Tom ends up taking the promotion. Lynette's happy for her husband until she learns it will lead to Tom being away even more than he is now. Tom doesn't care that his wife's upset about his plans. Lynette takes care of the problem, though, by suggesting to Tom's boss's wife that the promotion won't be good for Tom. Tom loses his promotion, and tries to make the best of it, though at the same time Lynette sees what she's done to her husband.


    Julie wants to go to Zach's pool party, but her mother's dead-set against Julie spending time with crazy Zach. But wheen Susan's being questioned by the police, Julie sneaks away to the party. Things are going good for a few minutes until Andrew and other teens mock Zach, who then suggests to Julie he could shoot them all. Distressed, Julie leaves. Later, Susan fears Julie and Zach are at the pool party alone together, but the couple she catches together is Justin and Andrew, who insists he's not gay.


    THE LADIES WHO LUNCH (Episode 16)

    Maisy was arrested for prostitution, and as the news spread around Wisteria Lane, Bree realized that it would come out that Rex had hired Maisy’s services. When Bree’s bribe failed to sway Maisy to help her, Bree bristled as the truth about Rex and Maisy became known around town.


    Meanwhile, Gabrielle and Carlos found their septic system collapsing, and Mike informed them it would cost big money to fix. Gabrielle came up with several short term solutions, including stealing a Port-o-potty and using other people’s bathrooms under false pretenses. But the solution to the problem came when Bree offered money for her friend.


    Lynette found her kids were responsible for an outbreak of lice at the private school. She cleaned up their hair but discovered it was harder to clean up the aftermath, as others didn’t want to be around the kids who had spread the lice. But when Lynette learned that Tammy’s kid was responsible for the lice, Lynette confronted Tammy at her son’s birthday party, then was relieved when Tammy decided to tell the other mothers Lynette’s twins weren’t responsible.


    After not leaving the house for several days in the aftermath of her breakup with Mike, Susan found a surprising ally in Edie, who was trying to show herself capable of being caring. Edie and Susan got drunk at a bar together, where Susan theorized that Paul had killed Mrs. Huber. The duo broke into Paul’s home, where they discovered a tape of Mary Alice and Felicia together but didn’t see the contents. Edie kept them from being discovered by kissing Paul, who surprised them by returning home early. Later, Paul found the tape in a different spot.


    Mrs. Huber’s sister Felicia is still around—and she hasn’t forgotten about the connection between herself and Angela.


    THERE WON'T BE TRUMPETS (Episode 17)

    Juanita awakens from her coma, but she slips on the hospital stairs and dies. While this devestates Carlos, he’s happier because he’s been offered a plea bargain—though he doesn’t plan to take it. Gabrielles’ upset when Carlos wants to have a huge funeral for his mother, since Gabrielle realizes they can’t afford that. Carlos agrees to go to prison for several months so Gabrielle can have everything back. The hospital offers Gabrielle 1.6 million which she takes, but after learning that the money will be taken away if she receives it before Carlos goes to prison, Gabrielle doesn’t tell Carlos about their windfall.

    When Mike slips a note beneath Susan’s door, Susan can’t bring herself to read the letter. What she can do, though, is find herself interested in Edie’s contractor, Bill, even though Edie has her eyes on him for herself. Susan decides to go out with Bill after arguing with Edie about him. Edie fires the contractor and tells Susan their friendship is over. Susan slips a letter underneath Mike’s door.

    Lynette befriends Alisa, a deaf woman, and her husband Dennis. Lynette’s appalled by the horrible things Dennis says about Alisa since Alisa can’t hear them. Tom agrees with his wife but doesn’t want to tell Alisa the truth. Lynette tells Dennis what she thinks of him, and he informs Alisa he wants a divorce. Alisa denounces Lynette, blaming her for the end of their marriage, while Tom comforts her because she was trying to do the right thing.

    Andrew’s behavior goes from bad to worse when he’s expelled from school for smoking pot and injuring a security guard. Bree wants Andrew taken to a youth detention center, but Rex is against this plan. But when Andrew kicks Bree, Rex confronts his son. Later, Bree and Rex say goodbye to Andrew as he’s taken away, although he doesn’t leave before spitting in Bree’s face. Bree is glad to have Rex there to help her.

    CHILDREN WILL LISTEN (Episode Eighteen)

    Susan’s own dramas take a backseat this week when her mother, Sophie Bremmer, shows up. Susan’s upset when Sophie reveals she’s been abused by her ex, Morty, although Susan’s distress mostly involves her wish that Sophie not live with her. When Sophie realizes this, she becomes mad at Susan. Susan convinces Morty to talk to Sophie, but then Susan learns it’s Sophie who’s been abusing Morty by hitting him.

    Desperate to get out of the house for a while, Lynette convinces Bree to babysit her kids. But when Bree spanks one of Lynette’s kids, Lynette becomes angry at Bree and makes accusations about Bree’s parenting. This strikes a cord with Bree, who’s feeling guilty about sending Andrew away to a boot camp for troubled teens. Lynette also questions her own parenting style when her husband Tom points out that Bree’s spanking may have accomplished more than Lynette’s empty threats of spanking. Lynette and Bree make up, but not before Bree visits Andrew at the boot camp and learns Andrew thinks he’s gay.

    Gabrielle’s caught in her own deception when Carlos learns about the check from last week’s episode. Carlos tries to convince Gabrielle to sign a post-nuptial agreement that will assure Gabrielle’s penniless if she ever tries to divorce him, but Gabrielle strikes back by threatening to tell the authorities about Carlos’ secret bank account in the Cayman Islands. When Carlos later tells Gabrielle he moved the money, he then proceeds to manhandle Gabrielle and forces her to sign the agreement. Gabrielle gets back at Carlos in her own way by sleeping with John, but Mary Alice suggests that Gabrielle’s about to become pregnant.

    When the detectives investigating the toy box Paul threw into the lake question Paul, he denies knowing what happened to his toy box. Zach learns that the box contained a woman; he questions his father, who admits the woman was a P.I. who was going to take Zach away from the only family he’d ever known. But it’s Felicia who provides the true shock for Zach, as she reveals to him that she knew his mother—and she knows his first name was Dana.

    LIVE ALONE AND LIKE IT (Episode Nineteen)

    Bree brings Andrew home but can’t bring herself to accept he’s gay. When Andrew reacts badly to Bree bringing in a minister to help him, Bree reveals Rex’s S&M fetish. After Bree tells Andrew that she doesn’t think he’s going to heaven, Andrew cleans up his act—not out of the goodness of his heart, but, as he tells the minister, because he plans on doing something awful in the future that will destroy his mother.

    Lynette is reluctantly there for mean neighbor Mrs. McCloskey when she has to be taken to the hospital. Afterwards, Mrs. M. is nice to Lynette—sort of—but Lynette doesn’t want to help her neighbor with her errands. When Lynette fears her neighbor’s dead, she checks in on the old woman, who’s alive—and Lynette agrees to help the old woman with her errands.

    Gabrielle’s continuing her affair with John but makes it clear she doesn’t want him as anything more than a boytoy. She refuses to allow Carlos back into her bed until he destroys the post-nup—and he retaliates by cutting her off from credit cards and the ATM. John gives her his credit card but it doesn’t work for long, and Gabrielle must flirt with a guy at a restaurant to get her bill paid. After Gabrielle makes it clear to Carlos that she’ll survive without him, he destroys the post-nup.

    Susan’s dismayed by her mother’s antics: Sophie flirts with the ice cream truck man, and even brings home two men, with one of them for Susan. Susan doesn’t think her mother should be doing this, and pushes her mother to realize that she’s not over Mike as quickly as Sophie’s over Morty. Sophie tries to convince Mike to reconcile with Susan, but he has other things on his mind: his financial backer, Noah, tells him that Noah’s daughter Deidre was found, dead, in a toy box—and Mike learns that the box may have belonged to Paul. We, in turn, learn Mike went to prison for killing a cop.



    FEAR NO MORE (Episode Twenty)

    Lynette learns that Tom's been working with his ex, Annabel, for the past 3 months. Worried about this, Lynette invites Annabel to dinner in hopes of convincing Annabel that Lynette and Tom's marriage is rock solid. Tom's put off by Lynette's tactics, but it's Lynette who's left in the cold when she ends up at home as Tom and Annabel pull an all nighter at work.

    George runs into Bree when she’s with Rex and they agree to go out together; but when Rex doesn’t like the idea of Bree and George spending time together, Bree tells George she can’t be with someone who has feelings for her. George lies, claiming he has a girlfriend, and he forces one of his coworkers to attend the Solis’ party as his date. When Rex sees this, he shoves George into the pool, and George brings Bree with him! Afterwards, Bree and George agree to be friends in secret.

    Zach tries to get close to Julie again but she wants nothing to do with him. Mike overhears Edie tell Paul about breaking into his house, so Mike warns Susan about staying away from Paul. After a confrontation with Paul, Susan’s kitchen explodes, and she hires Mr. Shaw to find out what’s going on.

    Meanwhile, Felicia flashes back to a time when she told her sister Mrs. Huber about how Mary Alice -- once known as Angela -- disappeared at about the same time as a drug addict’s baby boy, who’s now known as Zach, vanished from Utah.

    After vomiting, Gabrielle suspects she's pregnant, and a pregnancy test confirms her suspicions. When she discovers her birth control pills have been tampered with, Gabrielle causes a scene at Carlos’ pre-prison party by slapping him.


    SUNDAY IN THE PARK WITH GEORGE (Episode 21)

    Gabrielle confronts Carlos about what he did to the birth control, but Carlos blames his misdeeds on his dead mother. Gabrielle admits to John she’s pregnant and he wants to come clean with Carlos, but Gabrielle convinces him not to do so, and an oblivious Carlos thinks of John as practically family.

    Lynette fears that going for 10 days since she and Tom had sex means their marriage is in trouble. They try to have sex, but Lynette’s messy appearance keeps Tom from enjoying himself. Lynette dresses as a French maid in hopes of enticing Tom, but when Tom arrives home, she’s asleep, and he and his colleague discover her new look. Tom dresses in skimpy underwear in hopes of turning on his wife, and his tactics work.

    Morty returns and he and Sophie become engaged! Sophie and Morty both think Susan and Mike should try to work things out. Meanwhile, Mr. Shaw has told Paul about Susan hiring him, and thanks to Paul, Mr. Shaw tells Susan that Paul’s claims have been true all along. Susan hires Mr. Shaw to investigate Mike, and learns he killed a cop! But this investigation leads him to Deirdre’s family, where Kendra informs Susan that Mike was acting in self defense to save Deirdre from a bad cop. Thanks to this news, Susan and Mike reunite.

    As Paul’s keeping Zach drugged, Felicia finds the unconscious Zach and takes him to her house. Later, Felicia confronts Paul, informing him she knows he killed Martha, and Martha’s diaries reveal everything. Felicia insists that Paul leave town, and leave Zach with her. Paul reluctantly agrees.



    GOODBYE FOR NOW (Episode Twenty-two)


    Susan and Mike decide to move in together, to Edie’s horror. Edie convinces the other women that this is a bad idea, but when Susan joins them for an intervention, Susan convinces her friends that Mike’s a good guy.

    Zach’s frustrated to learn his father left town; Felicia stops him from finding a note that says Zach’s to meet Paul secretly Thursday night. Felicia tells Mike where to find Paul and gives him Martha’s diary. When Susan finds this, she becomes suspicious of Mike again. Mike knocks Paul out.

    Gabrielle learns that it’s impossible her mother-in-law dabbled with her birth control, so Carlos admits to his mistake. Carlos becomes suspicious of Gabrielle when she’s around Justin. She drives away from her house, after first suggesting to Carlos he’s not the father. Carlos follows Gabrielle to Justin’s, and ends up attacking Justin for having an affair with his wife! When Carlos is arrested, he learns Justin’s gay, and can’t believe he’s attacked a gay guy for the second time. Now Carlos believes Gabrielle made up the affair to make him angry.

    Tom’s upset that Lynette keeps stopping by the office to check up on Annabel. Lynette comes up with a new plan to get rid of her supposed rival: she tries to get Annabel hired on at another firm. But Annabel uses the offer to get a promotion Tom had wanted. When Tom confronts his boss about this, Tom quits his job -- then learns Lynette earlier kept him from the promotion he’d wanted.

    Bree breaks off her friendship with George after catching him with an erection around her. George goes to her house, switches out Rex’s heart medication pills, and then finds Rex’s box of S&M gear. Later, George tells Bree that Rex was bragging at the hospital about his S&M fetish. Rex denies this, but Bree’s angry at him anyway, and when he starts to have a heart attack, Bree makes the bed instead of immediately driving him to the hospital.




    ONE WONDERFUL DAY (Episode Twenty-three)

    At the hospital, Rex apologizes to Bree for the mistakes he’s made as a husband. But when Rex’s doctor informs him that his potassium levels are high and suggests Bree may be poisoning him, Rex writes a letter to Bree forgiving her for what she’s done. Later, Bree’s at home when she gets a call: Rex is dead! Bree holds herself together for a while before finally sobbing uncontrollably.

    Gabrielle testifies for Carlos after first getting him to agree he’ll be taking care of their child. But when John comes into the courtroom and tells Carlos about his affair with Gabrielle, Carlos becomes enraged and tries to attack John! Only it appears Carlos is going after Justin.

    Lynette learns Tom quit, and also learns he knows about what happened with the promotion before. Later, Tom tells Lynette he’s come up with a plan: he’s going to be a stay at home dad, and Lynette’s going back to work! Lynette begins to warm to the idea.

    Edie introduces herself to new neighbors Betty and Matthew Applewhite, who moved in to their house sight unseen and who don’t want Edie to come inside.

    Angry at Felicia after she tells him Paul’s not coming back, Zach beats her up. He then proceeds to hold Susan at gunpoint, as they wait for Mike to return home. Meanwhile, Mike’s taken Paul out to a deserted quarry, where Paul reveals the truth about Mary Alice’s secret: Deirdre sold her baby to Paul and Mary Alice, who moved away and changed their names. When Deirdre came back for Dana -- now known as Zach -- Mary Alice accidentally killed Deidre and then they buried her body in a box in the pool. After learning the truth about Zach, Mike leaves Paul stranded, then returns home, never suspecting Zach’s waiting with a gun.

    NEXT (Episode 24)

    Mike’s surprised to see Zach with a gun, but Susan tries to take control of the situation, leading to Zach running out of the house and Susan becoming injured. At the hospital, Susan tells a police officer about evil Zach but privately Mike suggests to the officer that Susan exaggerated what happened; Julie overhears this and tells Susan, who confronts Mike. Mike and Susan go to the morgue to identify a body that may be Zach’s, but to Mike’s relief, it’s not Zach. Susan realizes that Zach is Mike’s child and Mike admits this. Later, Susan informs Mike that she can’t live with him because of Zach.

    Bree asks Betty to play the organ at Rex’s funeral, and she accepts. Matthew tells Danielle he lost his father, too, but Betty calls Matthew on his lie and says he should leave the cleverness to Betty. After the funeral, Betty and Matthew take a tray of food down to someone in the basement -- but Matthew has to take a gun with him. Who are they keeping captive down there?

    Lynette prepares for a job interview but she’s worried as she’s been away from business for 7 years. At the interview, her interviewer, Nina, doesn’t like it when Lynette reveals she has 4 kids, though Lynette stresses her husband will be taking care of the kids. But when Tom throws out his back just as Lynette’s going to her followup interview, Lynette’s forced to take baby Penny with her. She almost screws up the interview thanks to her focus on Penny, but after she proves she can multitask by changing Penny’s diaper while giving a speech about plans for the company, she gets the job.

    John tries to get Gabrielle back but she tosses him out of her house. At the prison, Gabrielle tries to make things up with Carlos but he has one big demand: a paternity test. Rather than getting a test herself, Gabrielle steals the results from someone else and tells Carlos, but he doesn’t appear to think it’s enough.

    Bree tells the other women about Rex’s death. Her mother-in-law Phyllis Van De Kamp shows up, sobbing melodramatically. Later, she wants Rex to wear an orange tie at the funeral, but Bree insists that won’t happen. When Bree and Phyllis argue with the reverend over the details of Rex’s funeral, Bree uninvites her mother-in-law from the funeral. Andrew and Danielle convince Bree to have a change of heart about this, and Bree and Phyllis appear to make up. But when Bree sees that Phyllis has put the orange tie on Rex’s body, Bree makes a scene at the funeral by taking Tom’s tie from him and putting it on Rex.


    YOU COULD DRIVE A PERSON CRAZY (Episode 25)

    Susan learns that her ex-husband Karl is sleeping with Edie; later, Julie reveals Karl and Edie have been dating for months. They may even be moving in together! Susan tells Mike she wants to keep their relationship casual, but pulls away from getting hot and heavy with him. After Edie brags to Susan that Karl thought sex with Edie was the best he’s ever had, Susan one ups her rival by noting that Karl wanted to reunite with Susan! As Edie uses her roller skates to follow Susan as she drives away, Susan accidentally backed into Edie with her car.

    When Phyllis makes a point of grieving in public, Bree becomes tired of her mother-in-law’s antics, and slaps Phyllis! Phyllis suspects Bree is glad Rex is gone. Meanwhile, Rex’s doctor tells the insurance investigator about the note Rex left forgiving Bree. Phyllis calls the insurance investigator after seeing Bree and George in a close hug, and the investigator starts to probe into whether Bree killed Rex.

    Gabrielle’s frustrated that Carlos still controls her bank accounts. But it’s Carlos with the major problem: unless Gabrielle pays an inmate’s girlfriend $7,000, the inmate will attack Carlos! Gabrielle delivers the money but after learning the girlfriend doesn’t want to use the money for breast implants, Gabrielle pockets the money. Carlos is beaten because of this, and he must agree to give Gabrielle control of the money before she’ll take the money back to the woman.

    Lynette comes home to find a messy house; Tom didn’t even change the bed after Penny threw up in it! Mad at her husband, Lynette sleeps on the couch. Later, she comes home with a rat, which she places within the messy house. After work, Lynette comes home and finds the house is spotless, but the rat is dead! Lynette thanks the dead rat for helping her marriage.

    Susan questions Betty about the noises from inside the Applewhite home, but Susan catches Betty in a lie about it being Matthew’s fault. Betty tells a psychiatrist a story about why she has insomnia, and he gives her sleeping pills, which she proceeds to put in her captive’s food to keep him quiet.


    YOU’LL NEVER GET AWAY FROM ME (Episode 26)

    Bree learns Rex’s body has been dug up because she’s under investigation for Rex’s murder! Bree sends her mother-in-law home, then takes a polygraph test to clear her name. But the test suggests she loves George. Bree has George take the polygraph test and he passes it with flying colors.

    Carlos is upset that Gabrielle’s never genuinely apologized for her affair. Gabrielle follows John to his latest job, and learns he’s sleeping with a woman even older than her! She destroys the woman’s bushes, and when John finds Gabrielle, Gabrielle tells him she doesn’t want to be with him again. She goes to Carlos and gives him the apology he wanted.

    Lynette’s new boss Nina won’t let Lynette off the hook when Lynette wants time off on Parker’s first day of kindergarten. Lynette uses a remote camera so she can see Parker on his first day, but she keeps getting called away to an important meeting. Desperate, Lynette causes a cup of coffee to spill in Nina’s lap, allowing Lynette time to say goodbye to Parker before he heads to his class.

    When their basement prisoner escapes, Betty and Matthew must hit him to get him back to the basement.

    Susan’s mad when she learns Edie will be playing the guitar with Julie at a church talent show, so Susan goes to Betty for piano lessons in hopes of taking Edie’s place at the show. After Edie and Susan argue over who will accompany Julie, Julie chooses her mother. At the show, though, after seeing Karl and Edie in the audience, Susan has a change of heart and lets Edie take over. Without her guitar, Edie’s forced to play piano, and she’s no good at it.

    Felicia warns Mike that Paul will come back to search for Zach.



    MY HEART BELONGS TO DADDY (Episode 27)

    Lynette blames her going back to work when Parker develops an imaginary friend named Mrs. Mulberry. She tries, and fails, to convince her son to give up his new friend. She steals the imaginary friend’s umbrella and tosses it away, but when Parker sees the umbrella destroyed by a garbage truck, Parker grieves the loss of his friend. Tom comforts Lynette who fears she’s a bad mother for what she’s done.

    Gabrielle starts a prison riot after arguing with Carlos’ lawyer about a conjugal visit. Firing the lawyer, Gabrielle seeks new representation, and she meets David Bradley, who’s immediately interested in her sexually. Gabrielle does succeed in getting a conjugal visit with Carlos.

    Susan tells Mike she’s okay with Zach and agrees to help find him. While handing out fliers about Zach, Susan finds him, but he runs away and threatens her with a piece of wood. Returning to Mike, Susan doesn’t tell him what she found. When Susan again finds Zach, she wants to take him to Mike, but learning that Zach still wants Julie leads Susan to give Zach money to go to Utah to search for Paul.

    Andrew is not at all pleased to find his mother’s become close friends with George. He doesn’t want to attend dinner with George but Bree forces him to do so. The dinner goes badly. Later, George kisses Bree at Andrew’s swim meet, and a furious Andrew attacks George. Thanks to George’s plan, Bree sends Andrew back to his special camp.



    THEY ASKED ME WHY I BELIEVE IN YOU (Episode 28)

    After she threatens to sue the city, Bree gets Rex’s body returned to her and she plans to rebury her husband. When the detective investigating Bree shows her the note Rex wrote before he died, Bree is furious that Rex could think so badly of her, so she has Rex’s body placed in a new grave in a bad part of the cemetery, and she throws away her wedding ring at the same time.

    Tired of her boss being so stressed, Lynette takes Nina to a bar, where Nina ends up meeting someone and having sex. The next morning, Nina’s actually nice! Now Lynette’s stuck going with Nina to the bar every night. Tiring of this quickly, Lynette develops a plan: she undresses a bit, flirts with the men, and becomes more popular in the bar than Nina, who’s upset at not getting any more attention.

    Susan meets with her good friend and agent Lonnie, who is starting a new agency -- because he’s embezzled money from his clients. Susan wants to stay with him anyway, and Mike tells Susan he doesn’t believe in second chances. This causes Susan to tell Julie what she did with Zach. When Lonnie admits to embezzling Susan’s money, she tells him she can no longer be his agent, and after he tries to kiss her, she runs away.

    Carlos doesn’t want David as his lawyer because David looks so handsome. Determined to keep David as Carlos’ lawyer, Gabrielle urges David to insist to Carlos he’s got no interest in Gabrielle. Instead, David tells Carlos he’ll seduce Gabrielle unless Carlos hires David. Carlos takes on David as his lawyer.

    Betty learns that in Chicago someone’s been arrested for the murder of Melanie Foster. She writes a note about this to the police, explaining that they have the wrong guy -- because Caleb, her basement prisoner, is actually responsible. Matthew doesn’t want the note sent but Betty sends it anyway. Caleb almost escapes from the basement but after overhearing Betty say that he’s slow and would be executed for his crime, Caleb goes back to the basement.

    Paul Young returns to his home on Wisteria Lane.



    I WISH I COULD FORGET YOU (Episode 29)

    Whenever George goes to kiss Bree, she develops hives. Bree reacts badly when Dr. Goldfine tells her this is a psychosomatic illness. Bree and George go away for a romantic weekend together, where she again develops hives. George gives Bree medication for the problem, knowing it’ll leave her out of it. Later, Bree awakens to find George has been at her bedside. She’s not ready to have sex with him, but then relents, and the two have sex.

    Lynette’s boss Nina and other coworkers make fun of Lynette’s wornout suits, so Lynette buys a bunch of expensive new suits. Tom convinces Lynette she must take back the suits as they’re too expensive. She decides to wear a suit to an important presentation, but hides the price tag -- until Nina finds it and rips it away. Tom’s again upset, until Lynette tells him they need to splurge occasionally -- and she’s bought him brand new golf clubs!

    Carlos’ lawyer, David, is shot by the police, after David’s almost shot by a stalker. Gabrielle visits David in the hospital and he seems smitten by her . . . so smitten, in fact, that David walks out of the courtroom later and confesses to Gabrielle he loves her! Gabrielle entices David by wearing lingerie and telling him she won’t leave Carlos, but will have an affair with David. When David agrees to these terms, Gabrielle makes David see that he doesn’t love her, as Carlos would never settle for an affair.

    While helping fit Sophie for her wedding dress, Susan learns from Mike that he may be proposing soon. But Susan has a new problem, as she learns Paul’s back and she fears for her life. She turns him into the police, but fearing for his own neck, Mike lies to the police and doesn’t back up Susan’s story about Paul. Frightened by Paul, Susan admits to him that she sent Zach away, and Paul spills this news to Mike. Susan’s forced to admit the truth to Mike, and Mike dumps Susan, then leaves as she’s sobbing in the street.



    COLOR AND LIGHT (Episode 30)

    Lynette befriended Norma, whose twin boys got along with her twins. Their play dates went in a weird direction when the boys brought a videotape of their parents having sex. A mortified Norma pulled out of the playdates, and desperate to keep the friends for her sons, Lynette and Tom went to see Norma and her husband Leonard about the amateur porn. But when Leonard and Norma were both excited about sharing their porn interests with Lynette and Tom, the Scavos realized the play dates were over.

    George introduced Bree to his mother, and then he asked Bree to marry him. She accepted, reluctantly, and Dr. Goldfine had her admit she did so only out of politeness. George pushed things further when his mother threw a party for him and Bree and people wondered when Bree and George would be having kids. Upset, Bree told George she was unsure about the direction their relationship was moving, and mentioned that Dr. Goldfine had helped her make this decision. Later, George pushed Dr. Goldfine off a bridge.

    Susan wanted to be friends with Mike, but he doesn't want to be anything with her. As Susan's luck would have it, Karl and Edie also broke up, and Karl asked to spend the night at Susan's home. After too much alcohol, Karl admitted to Susan he and Edie broke up because she discovered he sometimes looks at a photo of him with Susan. Susan and Karl ended up sleeping together, to Julie's horror. Afterwards, Susan told Karl that they weren't back in a relationship. Edie and Karl reunited, and Edie thanked Susan, believing Susan had said something to make the reunion happen.

    Gabrielle wanted to fit into a new dress before meeting up with her former model friends, but to her horror she learned she'd expanded -- to a size zero. She decided to go without eating for a couple days, but this didn't help matters either, and she had to go to extraordinary lengths to tighten her dress. Bree believed that Gabrielle would come around to loving motherhood, but Gabrielle doubted this. After meeting with her friends, though, Gabrielle realized she no longer had anything in common with them. At home, Gabrielle was surprised by Caleb; running away, she ended up falling down the stairs and had to be taken away by ambulance. Has she miscarried?

    Betty couldn't convince Caleb to take responsibility for his actions. He broke out of the basement; as Caleb searched for Matthew, he ran into Danielle and pretended he was there to ask her out.



    THE SUN WON’T SET (Episode 31)

    The neighborhood meets to discuss the intruder, but when Mrs. McCluskey wants to hire security, Betty distracts them by playing the piano.

    A frustrated Lynette comes home to discover her kids are playing outside when they should be in bed; she chastizes her husband for allowing them out. Tom teaches the kids to run from strangers, but Lynette doubts this will work. To test her theory, she gets her co-worker Stu to go to her house and entice her kids with candy. Stu does manage to get the kids to come to him, and that’s when he’s attacked by Mrs. McCluskey with a taser!

    At the prison, Carlos is upset Gabrielle’s not upset about losing the baby. Gabrielle chooses instead to spend her time shopping. She’s surprised at home by Hector, who informs her he was sent by Carlos to help her. He won’t leave unti she decides to give him money, but he ends up taking her to the park, where he helps her say goodbye to the baby she lost by releasing a balloon.

    Mike tells Susan he won’t be coming to her mother’s wedding, and when Susan brings up that her father was a merchant marine who died in a Vietnam battle, Mike pokes a hole in the story, Susan confronts her mother at Sophie’s wedding rehearsal, but it’s Morty who has to tell her that Susan’s father was Sophie’s one night stand. Susan forgives her mother, until at the wedding when Sophie tearfully admits Susan’s father was a married man -- and he’s living in town! Susan fled the wedding and then learned where her father’s at.

    Bree’s distressed to learn George “accidentally” placed an engagement notice in the paper. George insists she wear his engagement ring if she won’t tell everyone about the relationship. When George’s ex warns Bree that George is crazy and once burned her ex’s car, Bree refuses to believe this; George convinces Bree that it’s his ex who’s the crazy one. When Bree meets with Ty Grant, her old boyfriend, George is so jealous that he makes a scene, leading to Bree ending their engagement. George steals Ty’s car and burns it.

    Caleb meets secretly with Danielle. Later, Mike catches Caleb, who’s taken away by the polic as the neighborhood watches, and Betty warns Caleb to remain quiet.

    THAT'S GOOD, THAT'S BAD (Episode 32)

    George begins to stalk Bree: he sings outside her house, bikes in front of her house, and just won’t leave her alone. When she tells the hospitalized Dr. Goldfine that she broke up with George, he happens to mention being attacked by someone on a blue bike, and Bree realizes what George has done. George runs away when he sees the police are searching his home and learns via a phone call with Bree that she knows what he did to the doctor. While Bree’s hosting an event at a hotel, George is at a room in the hotel. He sends a note for Bree and then when he learns she’s coming, he takes a bunch of pills. Bree finally shows up, as the pills have got to him, and she gets him to admit he killed Rex. Although she tells him she’s called an ambulance, she hasn’t, and she walks out, leaving George to die.

    Ed doesn’t like Lynette’s presentation at work and Nina also agrees it sucks, though Lynette’s frustrated when her coworkers won’t agree with her that it’s Nina who’s in the wrong. When Lynette goes to the office late at night, she discovers Nina’s having sex with Stu. The next morning, a pleased Lynette blackmails Nina: she’ll keep quiet about the hanky-panky if Nina’s nice. Nina agrees to this, but then Lynette learns that Stu’s been fired and other firings may be on the way. Lynette tells Stu to tell Ed the truth to get his job back, but this backfires, as Stu instead threatens sexual harrassment; Ed fires Nina, gives Lynette Nina’s job, and fires other people as well. Lynette learns Nina used to be nicer before she worked with Ed, and now Lynette may be the next to become bitter with no time for relationships.

    Gabrielle’s pleased when Carlos is paroled from prison, but less pleased when she learns Carlos owes his release to a Catholic group -- and specifically to a nun, Sister Mary. Carlos vows to be a good, less materialistic person from now on, to Gabrielle’s horror. Gabrielle invites the nun over for a meal, fearing that Carlos is romantically interested in this woman. Instead of pledging his love for the nun, though, Carlos pledges his sports car, and also decides to give up his materialistic ways. Gabrielle tries to talk Carlos out of this by seducing Carlos, and afterwards, she urges the nun to keep her distance. But Mary’s not giving up without a fight, she claims -- and she has God on her side.

    Susan tells Julie she doesn’t want to be close to her father, but when she meets him, and he gives her a promotional hat from his store, she’s excited. She plans to get a job at his store, get to know him, and then eventually tell him the truth about their relationship. None of Susan’s friends like this plan, but Susan goes for a job interview anyway. She’s overqualified and too eager, so her father mistakenly believes she’s been sent by his wife’s private eye. When Susan tells him he’s her father, he goes into another room -- and then she finds he’s collapsed, thanks to a heart problem. At the hospital, Susan wants to get closer to her father, but he wants nothing to do with her, as her presence could ruin his marriage. When her father’s wife shows up, Susan doesn’t tell the woman the truth, but tells her father she’s not giving up on him.

    COMING HOME (Episode 33)

    Zach returns home, but Paul lies to him about knowing the identity of his biological father. Paul tells Mike that Zach's back but Paul and Mike are at a standstill over what happens next.

    After learning Caleb's in the psych ward, Betty goes there, pretending to want to play the piano. As she plays the piano, Matthew helps Caleb sneak away, never realizing that a man named Monroe plans to get Caleb. Monroe follows them out.

    Lynette wants to get day care at her office, but can't unless her boss's wife signs on. But Ed's wife Fran isn't about to leave her child at daycare, even after Lynette pleads her case. Lynette convinces Ed he should take control of the situation, but isn't prepared when Ed takes his child away from home without telling Fran! Fran and Ed squabble but Lynette forces the two to realize their own mistakes, and Lynette finally gets the daycare she wanted.

    Susan's still meeting with her father Addison, but he's not as into their meetings as she is. She's there for him, though, when he's arrested for soliciting a cop posing as a hooker. When Susan drives her father home, his wife Carol mistakenly believes Susan's having an affair with Addison, and paints WHORE on Susan's house. Addison agrees to tell Carol the truth, but it's Susan who tells Carol the truth, after Carol confronts her at the supermarket. Addison wants to get to know Susan better, but first he needs to work on his marriage, and Susan's okay with waiting until he's ready.

    Bree learns the police have proof against George, but she doesn't inform them of her role in his suicide. Andrew's come home, and he's angry at his mother for not suspecting George was evil. Hes not going to listen to her anymore, but he is going to invite his "special friend" Justin over. When Justin arrives and the two play video games, Andrew muses about Bree walking in on him fooling around with Justin. Andrew makes it clear he hates his mother and he's waiting for dirt on Bree before he destroys her. Later, when Andrew tells Bree he would feel better if he knew George suffered, Bree tells Andrew the truth about George's suicide, and he hugs his mother, having finally got dirt on her.

    Carlos and Gabrielle argue about his work with Sister Mary; Carlos and Sister Mary are working on a mission trip that's going to Botswana. When Gabrielle learns there aren't enough funds to send the nun, she donates the money so that Mary will leave for the trip. But this backfires, as Sister wants to take Carlos with her! Carlos and Gabrielle argue about this but Carlos is determined to go. To stop her husband from leaving, Gabrielle keeps the doctor from learning about Carlos' allergy to eggs, so Carlos ends up getting a bad injection and is very ill. Gabrielle fears she'll lose Carlos if he becomes too good for her, and she hears him call out for the nun...


    ONE MORE KISS (Episode 34)

    At a dinner party, Gabrielle gives Tom an kiss when he mentions he was a band geek who didn’t get kissed until he was 18. Lynette becomes jealous thanks to this but when she brings it up to Gabrielle, Gabrielle doesn’t see what the big deal is. Lynette also learns about Gabrielle’s affair with John and this complicates her perspective on the kiss. Lynette and Tom are divided about what the kiss means.

    Meanwhile, Carlos and Gabrielle also argue over her actions, and she tells her husband he should have an affair to even the score between them. Lynette and Gabrielle appear to make up but when Lynette doesn’t think Gabrielle understands her point of view, Lynette gives Carlos a long, passionate kiss. Afterwards, Carlos approaches Lynette and hints that Gabrielles’ given him permission to have an affair with her, but Lynette pushes him away.

    Bree sees Andrew kissing Justin and insists that Andrew not do such things in public. But Andrew doesn’t want to listen to his mother. Things become worse when Bree finds Andrew and Justin in bed in the morning; Andrew reacts by blackmailing his mother, as he says he’ll turn Bree in for killing George. Bree hires Karl as her lawyer, and he tries to put the fear of God into Andrew.

    After learning Zach’s back in town, Susan wants to bring him and Mike closer together. Zach’s frustrated that Paul insists on homeschooling him, and Paul lies when Zach wonders if he killed Mrs. Huber. After Zach apologizes to Susan and Julie for his actions, Susan decides to bring Mike and Zach closer together by arranging bowling, and Mike and Zach do bond. But when Paul learns about the meeting, he attacks Mike. Later, Julie gives Zach a kiss on the cheek.

    The women discuss the Applewhites, who they find creepy. Later, Monroe watches the Applewhite home from his car, where Edie tells him to leave as he’s been there for hours. When the Applewhites leave, Monroe sneaks in to get Caleb, but ends up falling through the stairs and dying. Betty learns he was in contact with someone from the Fosters in Chicago, and realizes she has to get rid of the body. But Betty and Matthew accidentally lock the keys in Monroe’s trunk with the body! The body is found when Susan accidentally hits the car and the trunk’s opened. The women suspect the Applewhites are involved.

    WE'RE GONNA BE ALL RIGHT (Episode 35)

    Susan has a bad blind date and things become even worse when she and her date headbutt and he must be taken to the hospital. There, she finds herself interested in Dr. Ron. Later, after Julie encourages Susan to ask him out, Susan returns to the hospital and makes up fake symptoms in order to spend more time with him. This backfires, however, as he orders an MRI for her. Going in for the MRI, she embarrasses herself, first by trying to put on the MRI dust jacket as a hospital gown, and then by asking Dr. Ron out -- while he’s not even present. Later, when Dr. Ron informs her that he’s worried she’s dying as he wasn’t able to find anything in the tests, she confesses what she did to him. He’s mad, but not so mad that he won’t agree to go out with her after a few days of cooling off.

    The women of Wisteria Lane are suspicious of Betty, who tries to make nice with her neighbors. Bree takes out the detective who investigated her for Rex’s murder in hopes of getting him to do a background check on the Applewhites, but her recitation of the evidence against them isn’t enough for the detective, especially since he thought she was asking him out for a date. After Bree politely turns him down, he tells her she’s had too much to drink and wants to drive her home. Believing he’s trying to get back at her, Bree is angry when he stops her car and arrests her for drinking. She’s allowed to go home but when she can’t get her car until morning, she ends up hitching a ride with Betty. After Betty suggests that Bree may in fact be drinking too much, Bree brings up Betty’s own secrets, leading Betty to call Edie to say she’s selling her house.

    Lynette comes home to find what Tom sees as an emergency: the kids have chickenpox! This is especially bad for Tom, who’s never had it before. Lynette thinks he’s being a baby but when he reminds her he’s an even bigger baby when he’s sick, Lynette arranges to stay home. Later, after Tom and Carlos chat about the situation, Tom brings up with Lynette the possibility that he could lose his fertility if he got chickenpox. Lynette’s not so sure what the big deal is, as they’re done having kids -- aren’t they? Yes, but Tom wants the option to have kids with someone else, in case Lynette dies. This doesn’t sit well with Lynette at all, as she’d prefer Tom be miserable in the case of her death. She convinces Tom that he should have a vasectomy. But he can’t go through with it, as he fears it would emasculate him. Both Tom and Lynette realize there’s a problem, but what can be done?

    Gabrielle’s gardener Ralph tells her he has a problem that’s wrecked his marriage. He’s addicted to porn -- including the pictures of Gabrielle he found on the Net! Gabrielle can barely believe this, and, mad at her ex-boyfriend Scott for what he’s done, she wants Carlos to go beat him up. He declares he’s become good now and won’t fall back on his rage issues again, even as Gabrielle urges him on. In the hopes of spurring Carlos to action, she undresses to do yoga, and her gardeners are so entranced that one cuts off the other’s finger by accident. But this seems to have done the trick, as Carlos is upset. He goes to confront Scott, and after some more urging from Gabrielle, decides he’ll only talk to Scott. Scott agrees to take down the pictures -- he was going to do so anyway, he tells Carlos, as Gabrielle’s photos weren’t particularly popular online. Carlos is so mad at this that he throws Scott through a door, to Gabrielle’s pleasure.

    A blood drive on Wisteria Lane leads Zach to realize that he and Mike share a blood type. Later, Mike meets with Noah, Deirdre’s father and Zach’s grandfather, who’s dying. Noah ends up firing his nurse, as he’s become even more bitter and nasty than before. Mike lies to Noah about the identity of Deidre’s killer and claims he killed Deirdre’s murderer. He also doesn’t plan on being involved with Noah anymore. But Noah may learn the truth eventually anyway, as his new nurse turns out to be Felicia, who knows all about what really happened.


    THERE’S SOMETHING ABOUT A WAR (Episode 36)

    When Edie doesn’t get her way while trying to watch TV, she ties Karl up under the guise of seducing him, then leaves him there to go watch TV.

    Matthew and Betty argue when he brings Caleb upstairs and gives his brother a bedroom. Later, Bree’s surprised to find Matthew hiding underneath Danielle’s bed, and she informs Betty of the romance -- but to Bree’s surprise, Betty slaps her son and orders him inside, then reveals they’re planning on moving soon. Betty warns Caleb to stay away from Danielle or she’ll slap him harder than she slapped Matthew. A tearful Danielle demands Bree do something to save her romance with Matthew, and Bree goes to Betty in hopes of making nice. But Betty has no intentions of doing so; meanwhile, Bree sees Caleb in the upstairs bedroom, tells Danielle, and plans to inform her friends. Danielle meets with Matthew, who admits they’re hiding Caleb, but Danielle placates him by revealing her family’s also hiding secrets. Betty informs Bree that if Bree tells anyone what she knows, Betty will inform everyone that Bree helped her son Andrew cover up Juanita’s hit and run. When the women arrive for Bree’s news about the Applewhites, Bree tells them instead that Betty is going to be joining their poker games from now on.

    At church, Gabrielle and Carlos argue about his wish to have kids, but Gabrielle becomes even more upset when she learns Sister Mary is back. She has good reason to worry, given that when Carlos admits his problems to Sister Mary, she urges him to annull his marriage to Gabrielle. He can’t convince Gabrielle to promise him a child, and he brings up what happened with Sister Mary. She retaliates by going to confession and telling Father Crowley that Sister Mary is ruining her marriage, though she makes the nun look worse by claiming Carlos and the nun had sex. Gabrielle goes to say goodbye to Mary, who’s being shipped to Alaska; when Mary realizes Gabrielle’s role, the two end up in a huge catfight. Carlos apologizes for the annulment talk and chooses Gabrielle over a kid. Pleased by his choice, Gabrielle tells Carlos she wants to have a child with him.

    Lynette gets Tom’s help for an important ad pitch, though all his ideas aren’t solid. The pitch ends up being successful, though Lynette ditched many of her husband’s ideas for it. Now Lynette’s company can afford another executive, and Tom suggests himself! Lynette’s not bowled over by the idea of working with her husband again. He shows up for an interview anyway, using a false name. During the interview, Lynette tries to sabotage her husband’s chances, but Ed loves Tom and wants to hire him on the spot. Later, Lynette tells Tom she confessed the truth to Ed and he can work there, with one condition: he has to forgive her for ruining his promotion before. He tells her he already has forgiven her, and all’s right in their world.

    After a date with Dr. Ron, Susan’s disappointed that he doesn’t want to join her inside. Dr. Ron tells her he doesn’t want to move too fast while he’s still her doctor, though he can’t stop himself from giving her a passionate kiss. Later, at the hospital, Dr. Ron tells her she needs a splenectomy, and he can handle it. Susan’s not sure about having him as her surgeon; he hasn’t seen her naked yet, and he’s never done this particular surgery before. Dr. Ron becomes upset when Susan brings up these issues and storms out. Afterwards, Susan waits at the hospital for Dr. Ron, and insists she’s through jumping through hoops for men. But Dr. Ron’s ready to apologize to Susan, and agrees he shouldn’t do the surgery for Susan, as he wants to be involved with her romantically now.


    SILLY PEOPLE (Episode 37)

    Bree's at a luncheon held by a neighbor when the FBI raid the house and reveal the neighbor is keeping a Chinese woman as her slave. Xiao-Mei, the former slave, is taken in by Carlos, over Gabrielle's objections. Gabrielle stops complaining when she realizes Xiao-Mei can cook, clean, and sew! She fails to convince Carlos to keep the ex-slave as their new maid, but after giving Xiao-Mei a piece of jewelry, the woman doesn't want to leave. Gabrielle has her maid, who considers herself family.

    Tom can't get Lynette to help him deal with their boss Ed, who vetoes his ad pitches. Tom ends up bonding with his boss over frat experiences, and then they bond some more as Ed dares him to do humiliating things. But this can only go so far, and Lynette urges her boss to stop the bets. She takes Ed on herself, challenging him to test her and if she wins, he'll stop daring Tom to do crazy things. She succeeds -- by eating a pound of raw bacon.

    Susan's lost her medical insurance thanks to her former agent; how can she afford her surgery? Edie suggests Susan marry someone, and even hooks her up with Gary, a gay man who wishes to marry for his mother's sake. But when Gary's life partner, Steven, objects to the marriage, Gary leaves Susan at the altar. When Karl learns of Susan's predicament he proposes marriage to Susan, who accepts. They both agree that Edie must never find out.

    Felicia gives Noah an anonymous note informing him he has a grandchild. With the help of Detective Sullivan, he gets into contact with Mike, who admits the truth about Zach. Noah gives Mike 2 days to bring Zach in to see him.

    Susan and Edie are concerned by Bree's change of heart about the Applewhites, but Bree keeps them at bay. She secretly sneaks off to the Applewhite home and talks to Caleb, who reveals what happened to Melanie Foster. When Betty learns about this meeting, she's furious, but Bree holds her ground and gets Betty to admit what happened with Caleb and Melanie. Touched by the length she's gone to protect her son, Bree finds herself commiserating with Betty.


    THANK YOU SO MUCH (Episode 38)

    Karl and Susan are preparing to get married. When Edie finds the ring and prenup, she mistakenly believes Karl is going to propose to her. Susan's feeling guilty about marrying Karl while she's dating Dr. Ron, but Julie convinces her she's in the right. Dr. Ron and Susan and Karl and Edie all end up at the same restaurant, where Susan freaks out after learning Edie thinks she's getting engaged tonight. Later, Susan tells Karl about Edie's beliefs, and he decides to propose to Edie too. Susan claims she's not jealous of Karl proposing to Edie. Later, Susan and Karl tie the knot.

    Mike urges Paul to leave town with Zach before Noah finds them. Zach overhears and learns he's Mike's son.

    Gabrielle's sexy flirt of a mother Lucia arrives for a visit. When Gabrielle learns she might not be able to get pregnant again, she brings up the possibility of adoption, while Carlos is more drawn to the idea of surrogacy. Lucia surprises Gabrielle by saying she wants to be their surrogate! Carlos tries to get to the root of Gabrielle's issues with her mother and learns it dates back to when Gabrielle's stepfather sexually abused her at the age of fifteen. Carlos talks with Lucia about this, and after learning Lucia thinks Gabrielle seduced her ex, he tells Gabrielle he's willing to adopt.

    A depressed Bree drinks too much and must go home in a cab, where she then collapses on the front lawn. Mrs. McCluskey sees this and alerts Andrew, who's amused by his mother's condition. Meanwhile, Lynette doesn't want Mrs. McCluskey to babysit for her, and sends Mrs. McCluskey away. Lynette leaves her kids with a hungover Bree, who drinks some more and falls asleep. Lynette's kids take off and are found miles away. Bree claims the boys are lying when they say she was asleep, but later Mrs. McCluskey reveals the truth to Lynette. Lynette confronts Bree, who denies a problem; Lynette takes Bree's empty wine bottles and lines them up her doorstep to show Bree she has a problem.


    THERE IS NO OTHER WAY (Episode 39)

    Noah has Paul arrested and then attacked by two goons, and Mike wants to tell Zach what's happened, but Paul returns home, having fought off his attackers. Felicia's disappointed by Paul's survival.

    Tom isn't happy when Lynette doesn't like one of his pitches, especially when she claims he didn't give his best effort. Tom also believes Lynette's acting like his boss in the bedroom! Tom takes control of the situation in the elevator, when he stops and kisses his wife.

    Carlos and Gabrielle convince Lynette to lie for them in hopes of assuring they can adopt a child. The adoption agency worker is impressed until John's mother, Helen, who happens to work there, reveals that Carlos was in jail and Gabrielle had sex with her teenage son. The Solises are forced to go to a shady lawyer, who will find them a baby, at a price.

    Susan's in the hospital preparing for her surgery; Dr. Ron gives her flowers and Nurse Heisle tells her he's planning on telling Susan he loves her. When the nurse learns Susan's married to Karl, Susan convinces her to keep quiet. After seeing Mike, just as she's going to have her surgery, a doped-up Susan tells Dr. Ron she loves Mike. The nurse also admits to Dr. Ron that Susan's married to Karl!

    Lynette tells Gabrielle and Susan about Bree's drinking problem. Bree slaps Andrew when he gets snippy because she won't give him his trust fund money. He has his boyfriend Justin punch him in the face, then hires a lawyer to emancipate him from Bree under the pretense that Bree's an abusive drunk. Bree joins AA, not because she believes she has a problem, but because it will look better to a judge.


    COULD I LEAVE YOU? (Episode 40)

    Gabrielle's determined to find a pretty mother to give her a pretty baby, and she rejects an especially ugly mother. She's introduced to Libby, a pregnant woman who works at a strip club. The woman rejects Gabrielle as a mother, supposedly for being Mexican, until Gabrielle sways Libby with jewelry. It turns out that Libby has a man in her life, and may not have been honest with Gabrielle and Carlos about her situation.

    At AA, Bree admits to Peter that she's not really an alcoholic but is only trying to look good. Later, while having a drink at a department store, Bree sees Andrew using her credit cards, and he threatens to falsely claim Bree sexually molested him. Bree drinks some more and wakes up in the department store, locked inside! She has to call Peter for help, and he asks her if she's still convinced she has no problem.

    Matthew wants money for a present for Danielle's birthday. Danielle comes home to find Caleb in her bedroom with a present, and she's angry, throwing him out.

    Lynette hires an employee who likes having daycare at work. But Lynette and the rest of the office soon discovers that the woman is breastfeeding her 5 year old son! The office wants Lynette to talk to the woman about this, but the woman threatens legal action. Lynette convinces the 5 year old to try out chocolate milk. Later, Lynette's not sympathetic when she learns the woman was still breastfeeding so she could remain thin.

    Dr. Ron confronts Susan about Mike and she denies knowing anyone named Mike. Later, Susan has Dr. Ron over for dinner with her and Karl, to show that the marriage means nothing. Karl creates a problem with the sink, then sends Dr. Ron over to Mike's--where Dr. Ron learns Susan lied to him about knowing and dating someone named Mike. Dr. Ron storms out but later calls Susan again.


    EVERYBODY SAYS DON'T (Episode 41)

    Felicia's upset that everyone in the neighborhood is treating Paul like a neighbor. At Edie's engagement party, she makes a scene by giving Edie her sister's dentures as a gift, then reminds everyone Paul's a killer.

    Carlos and Gabrielle learn that Libby has a boyfriend, Frank, who doesn't know she plans on giving up her kid. Frank's angry with Libby's plan, even as Gabrielle and Carlos realize they can get the child if they convince Frank to sign away his rights. Libby stuns everyone by telling Frank that he's not the baby's father, as she had sex with cowboys at a rodeo! Libby gives birth to a baby girl and Carlos and Gabrielle are going to take her. When they overhear Libby tell Frank that his 19 year old brother is the baby's father, Carlos and Gabrielle kidnap the baby from the hospital.

    When Bree learns that Lynette is going to give a deposition about what happened with her kids, Bree tries to butter Lynette up, but Lynette sees through this and vows to tell the truth. She wants to believe Bree's innocent but is torn when she sees a picture of Andrew with a black eye. Lynette talks to Andrew and realizes he really wants a car. At the deposition, Lynette lies for Bree.

    Bree's sober, thanks to spending time with her sponsor, Peter. When she kisses him she learns he's a sex addict and he pulls away. He tells her he can't sponsor her any longer and hands her over to Donna, another woman at AA. But Bree is still interested in Peter. When he won't go with her to Edie's engagement party, Bree gets drunk at a bar. Peter comes and gets her. Is there something sparking between these two after all?

    Susan's horrified to learn that Edie's engagement party is a surprise wedding. Julie's horrified both by that and the sparks she senses between Susan and Karl, who doesn't appear excited by his engagement. Susan tells Karl about Edie's surprise wedding plans; they lie to Edie, but she's on to them, as Dr. Ron told her about the marriage. She's furious, and insists she could have handled the wedding if she knew the truth. In return, Karl's going to throw Edie a huge wedding, and Susan's going to do all the work for the wedding. At the engagement party, Susan confronts Karl over a picture of them together she found in his possessions; he admits he's not over her, and kisses his wife, but tosses her aside when Edie almost catches them together.

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